UCMeP’s Speech at the “Assembly to Defend Dean Edley’s Pension”

For those of you who could not make the rousing fundraising success that was last Wednesday’s “Assembly to Defend Dean Edley’s Pension,” we are happy to post the speech delivered by our UCMeP representative.

Enjoy.

As we are well aware, California is in a period of profound financial uncertainty. During such tough economic times no one is taking a bigger hit than our hardworking public servants. And among those struggling to get by at the UC, no one has made a bigger deal of their personal financial woes than the benevolent millionaires who lord over our daily lives here at the university.

In a spectacular embodiment of Boalt Law school’s commitment to social welfare, no pen has been working harder to argue that the UC’s wealthiest employees deserve even more money than that of Christopher Edley – Dean of this fine law school, special sidekick to UC President Mark Yudof, and architect of the Online UC, that profitable debt-manufacturing machine disguised as a civil rights project.

Now I am sure that we need not go into detail about the letters Dean Edley has signed, the missives he has authored, or even the interviews he has given on his own unfortunate pension situation. Nor do we need rehearse all the reasons Dean Edley has offered as to why he deserves more cash at a time when most UC employees making less than 10% of what Dean Edley earns either are being laid off or are facing the possibility of seeing their own pensions gutted.

All that need be said is what Dean Edley has been saying along: give the UC’s money not to those who need it, not to those who deserve it, but to those who already have tons of money!!  Doing so is not only fair, but it will help ensure that dedicated public servants like Dean Edley remain at the UC. And while keeping people like Dean Edley at the UC may not be the only way to kill public education in the State of California, it sure will help!!

For these reasons, we here at the UC Movement for Efficient Privatization (UCMeP) are proud to be leading a bold initiative aimed at helping those administrators who are terrified by the prospect of a retirement pension worth only paltry millions.

We are calling it the Bereft Administrators’ Relief Fund (aka BARF).

The aim of BARF is simple: UCMeP is asking each and every one of you to not only donate money, but also to help collect money for the UC’s wealthiest albeit most under-appreciated administrators. BARF is modeled on the astounding success of other grassroots humanitarian relief campaigns undertaken at the UC, which benefitted similar causes such as the devastating earthquake in Haiti. Although administrators like Dean Edley did not lose their homes, they sure could use another one.

After everything Dean Edley has done for the state of California, the very least we can give him is BARF. But if Dean Edley is going to get all the BARF he deserves, we must make BARF a collective effort.

To this end, UCMeP is happy to provide you with your very own BARF bags which you can use for collecting BARF from your family, friends, colleagues and classmates.

Thank you for your time and we sincerely hope that all of you will take part in this noble effort to help California keep its promise to the UC’s wealthiest administrators.